March 28, 2019

My nohohon life


Nohohon, also known as Sunshine buddies: Solar powered bobble head figurines supposed to have a relaxing effect.

The other day I was listening to a Ted Talk podcast about changes. We may not be aware of it but we change all the time. But are we all changing?
It is both strange and interesting. That blog I loved and checked every day for several years, I have not opened it for the last 2 years…I went to have a look, and wow, so boring…always the same stuff… So is that person not changing, staying just exactly the same? Or does he/she  feel he /she has to keep the blog the same for fear of losing readers?
We all know people who are stuck in their teen year era when it comes to hair and fashion style. Lack of change is comfortable but does it make you happy?
I know comfort doesn’t keep me happy very long…yet as years go by, I find it harder and harder to implement changes. So right now I am physically comfortable but my mind is going crazy. Not good.
 I have been doing the same things for ten years, nothing worked, I see no end to the tunnel. Have I become that person stuck in the past?
I used to hate neutral colors…now I’m all about neutral colors…so I have changed, but have I become boring? I know I am bored.

I am overwhelmed by stuff I have no control over. House stuff with things needing fixing and replacing. And that crazy amount of gardening I have to keep up with. Family stuff with me having to deal with sick people and mean family members. Having to deal with my increasingly difficult mom. Unemployment stuff, will I keep my benefits if I don’t keep applying for jobs I have zero interest in?  In the last year I sent about 200 applications. 200. I had one in-person-interview (didn’t get the job because I didn’t qualify for enough state salary subsidies) and 2 over the phone (I didn’t qualify because I was overqualified…). Will they force me to go follow some stupid classes again? Oh, which also reminds me I have to entirely re-make my resume website as it was in Flash and Flash is no longer supported by major browsers. I SO DON’T WANT to do it, yet know I will.
I am sick and tired of doing the same things over and over again. It’s like being stuck in a nightmare.

I want out.

I still haven’t been able to come up with a new business cards. Now I am thinking about doing something green LOL
And I have decided to move my shop from Shopify to Smoolis (because it allows several languages)

I am into photography classes right now…but just realized that my old Photoshop won’t open RAW files. So that overwhelms me a little too too (but have not reached the editing classes yet, so hopefully I’ll know what to do then). I need a new lens but can’t make up my mind.

But it just feel like I’m bobbling my head from left to right and right to left…



3 comments:

Star of the East said...

You've been in a dip for quite a while, I really hope a good positive change will happen soon to you! Have you checked for volunteer work, like at animal shelters? Just to get out of the house and do something you are passionate about?

Natalis Iolalis said...

I saw this cat on the preview and thought it was your new job. You write about the changes. Maybe it will be a new cat line of polymer clay?
Do not be sad

Stephanie Kilgast said...

First things first : your RAW file, I used "adobe DNG converter" to convert raw files to use on my old versions of lightroom and photoshop.
Now for the rest, sadly not such an easy solution. But you really do need to find something for yourself, it's been so long you've been down.
Change can a be a good thing indeed, sometimes it's a huge change, like selling your house and going somewhere else. Sometimes it's smaller, like changing the colors of your walls.
Neutral colors are good, embrace them. You've been doing kitschy kawaii for as long as I remember, maybe you want to change and are afraid to? Don't be, you've got nothing to loose!
Or maybe someone local can help you? I know my mum has decided to see a life coach, and it helped her. Might not be for you, but at that point, I feel like you need some help, be it only someone to talk to.
Many hugs!